The Wasp

There was a wasp in Thing One's room today.... And I'm a HUGE wuss when it comes to flying, stinging insects.

First I was just afraid because it was a wasp. I was stung several times by a single yellow jacket last summer. It wasn't an event I wanted to relive. Before I went to attack I was planning on donning long sleeves, long pants and sneakers. Do you think I did though? Of course not.

I stood at the door with the swatter in hand read to attack.... Or to run and slam the door shut. One time the wasp flew in my direction, and I hit it with the swatter. After that, I was afraid because while I *did* hit it with the swatter, I didn't kill it. I just (I'm sure) ticked it off. Then I couldn't find it. Heh, at one point I screamed loud enough to wake the dead because I saw a shadow behind me that I thought was the wasp. It wasn't. I'm just a chicken.

Finally I saw it. It had crawled up on the window over Thing One's bed. It went under the top part of the blinds, and I couldn't get to it. I knew that it was baiting me, and waiting for me to walk far enough into the room so it could sting me. I'm no dummy though. I wasn't walking in there! Instead I threw things at it... And the glass window that's over the bed. The custom window that's already been replaced once in the past 12 months... I'm no dummy. I wasn't going near that wasp! Ha!

When I ran out of things to throw (I thought about throwing the hard plastic back scrubber, but at least had the sense not to do so) I went and got a fishing pole we had downstairs, and I got the wasp spray. (Why do we have a fishing pole and wasp spray downstairs? Wouldn't you like to know? Okay... Thing One won it in fishing tournament a few weeks ago. Thing Two won one too. The spray was outside.) I stood as close to the door as possible -good thing the door is right across from the window, and pushed the pole up under the blinds. The wasp peeked out. He peered at me. He was planning his attack. "Just a little closer, sucker!" I could hear him saying... Or so I thought. But "not-uh" was my answer! I poked a little more, and, it finally came out. It was then that I realized that I must've broken it's wings when I hit it. And of course I felt bad. Not bad enough to stop going after it though!

I couldn't get a good shot with the swatter, so (after moving Thing One's bed out from the wall) I sprayed it with the poison. The wasp shook a little, waved it's arms and legs in an effort to try to get the foam off of it, lost it's grip on the blind string, fell, hit the window ledge on it's way down, landed on the floor, shook some more and died. I felt bad again. :-(

I went to work cleaning the spray foam poison off Thing One's window. When I was done, I picked up the paper on which the wasp had fallen. (Thank goodness for not cleaning under his bed often enough!) I started examining it when Thing One came in the room. We both looked at the wasp together, and then Thing One jumped and yelled "It's still alive" when the wasp's leg moved. I told him no, it was dead. It was moving only because I was messing it with (with the wipe). We went back to examining it, and it started moving MORE. I told Thing One to get out of his room.

He went running, and I put the wasp on the paper on the floor. I covered it with the wipe and smacked it with the hard plastic back scrubber. I picked up the wipe, and it was still alive. Covered it again, smacked a few times, check it, and it was STILL alive. Went through the process again, and it was STILL ALIVE!! Finally I put in in the toilet, but didn't flush it. (I didn't want to waste the water, but *I'M* certainly not going to be the one to use the potty with a wasp in there!) I'm over my not wanting to waste water, and getting ready to flush it now. Hoping that there won't be a surprise waiting under the lid for me. ACK!